Limitless: 1 star

*this will be a humorous review because this movie is awful

"A writer discovers a top-secret drug which bestows him with super human abilities." This is from IMDB and a horrible summary. I guess who ever updates IMDB didn't think this movie deserved the time it takes to write a proper summary. He doesn't discover it, someone he knows gives it to him. It doesn't' make him super human; that makes it sound like he can fly and shoot webs from his wrists. It just makes him smart, which last time I checked wasn't super human. However, the people involved in this film's production may think otherwise. 

Seriously, I went into this film with absolutely no expectations. I just wanted to have fun with it. I knew it wasn't Shawshank Redemption. I just wanted to turn my brain off and watch Bradley Cooper be cool. Unfortunately this film hurt my brain. I had to turn it off. That's right, please welcome Limitless to the very small group of films (three I think) that Patrick Mooney couldn't finish watching. I guess these days I just don't have the time to waste. I'm 30, I have things to do...like sit on the couch and watch anything but this. I gave Limitless one star instead of zero because it does have Bradley Cooper in it, and Bradley Cooper was in Wet Hot American Summer (which looks like Hamlet next to Limitless) therefore Limitless gets one star. 

One of the aspects of the film that was a huge turn off was it's treatment of women, or lack thereof. Limitless could be used to teach a college level film studies/media course on the treatment of women in modern society; specifically in media and film. If anyone still thinks women are now treated as equals and sexism is over then please watch this movie. Example: Eddie Mora's (Cooper) girlfriend breaks up with him at the start of the movie. Eddie is failing as a writer, doesn't take care of himself anymore and is a horrible boyfriend. He's no longer the man she fell in love with.  She delivers a very well thought out reason for her decision and they part amicably. Eddie obtains the magic pills and becomes smart and successful. He then bumps into his ex on the street and says some stuff that is really smart. He's also no longer dressed like a homeless person. She immediately (give or take a few hours) disrobes and has sex with him. Only after a few weeks does she realize that he still isn't the guy she fell in love with years ago. Oh, and prior to his ex, he met a few other women along the way who reacted the same way. Apparently you gals only care about suits and money and absolutely love New York club bathrooms; so romantic. I guess her previous reasoning for leaving him was a lie and she really only cared that he looked gross and had writers block (remember: he wasn't dumb, he just had writers block). 

Another turnoff was the direction. Director Neil Burger uses an absolutely nauseating effect to portray passage of time while Eddie is on the "medication". It's kind of hard to explain, but it's basically blocks and blocks of city streets collapsing into the 2D plane of the TV. It's meant to seem like you are travelling quickly down these streets, but since the images are coming towards you while you stay still it feels more like everything is collapsing into the viewers brain instead of the viewer moving forward. It's awful. Other than that, nothing really impressive to report artistically. 

Basically Limitless is a waste of your time. Unless you want to have an "objectifying women" drinking game I would stay away from this one.

Drive: 4 stars

A Hollywood stunt performer who moonlights as a wheel man discovers that a contract has been put on him after a heist gone wrong.

Drive is nothing like Fast and the Furious. Lets get that straight out of the way. Apparently I missed something in the advertising, but I'll assume more than one person thought that Drive was going to be a gear head action movie since the studio was sued by a woman who felt she was led astray by the trailers. When there was little to no dialogue for the first twenty minutes and an 80's synth soundtrack she probably realized The Driver (Ryan Gosling) wasn't going to be anything like Paul Walker. 

Drive is directed by Nicolas Winding Refn who brought us Valhalla Rising, Bronson and the Pusher series. While I haven't seen any of those films (except the first 10 minutes of Valhalla Rising) I certainly do know a little about them and that was enough to know Drive wasn't going to be what it seemed. No matter what impression the trailer left on me I figured I'd be in for a surprise; and what a giddy surprise it was. Drive is, simply put, an extremely badass art house flick. It's hard to call it action because the action is sparse and brief. It's not really a chase film because there are only a few. The best way to describe it is a modern and twisted Bullitt, but even that doesn't really work. Drive stands alone and while the story isn't that original the delivery of that story certainly is. 

Drive works well on many levels. It's beautifully shot, has solid acting (some great), gritty violence and a good story. However, what makes it excellent is the mysterious main character. The Driver is known as just that, or Kid as his boss Shannon (Bryan Cranston) calls him, and that's what he does; he drives. He is a stunt driver part time in movies, a mechanic at Shannon's body shop, and he moonlights as a nameless getaway driver whose rules you must abide by if you want to get away. He knows cars and can do anything behind the wheel. We don't know his name, where he came from, who his family is or how he got where he is; we just know he's been there a few years. It's this mystery that makes his actions so fascinating and we realize we're watching the origin story of a legend. Shannon has a business partner Bernie (a fantastic Albert Brooks) who agrees to front Shannon money to invest in a stock car that The Driver will drive (duh). Let's just say we get the impression that Bernie isn't a legitimate businessman. The Driver has a neighbor Irene (Carey Mulligan) who cares for her young son while her husband is in jail. The Driver helps her out for a few weeks, bonds with her and her son and then her husband Standard gets out of jail. The story then kicks into full gear with The Driver agreeing to help Standard with a heist that goes wrong. It gets complicated, but as always I'll let you discover the important parts on your own. 

There are a few scenes that are there to simply illustrate that The Driver, while the hero of this story, is not a very nice man. We don't know much about him and we probably don't want to or need to. The important thing is that this time all of The Driver's actions and decisions are based in the desire to help Irene and her son in anyway he can. 

By the end of the film we can see someone in our minds, two years later, telling the story of the The Driver. He knows somebody who knew somebody who knew somebody who knew him. He doesn't have all the details of his life, but what he does for Irene and her son are bigger than life. Isn't that what legends are all about? It's not necessarily what they do, but why they do it. Life isn't black and white and sometimes you have to get your hands dirty to be a real human being; to be a real hero.

http://youtu.be/-DSVDcw6iW8